Zombies: The gift that keeps on giving

Years ago, I wrote The Zombie Dating Guide: part humor/part self-help guide for my daughter entering the dating world. I didn't want her to take herself - or teenage dating habits - too seriously. It was a short, fun book and I loved the reaction it garnered from friends, apparently they needed a little spice in their love lives that included Spackle tips. Every Valentine's Day, the site gets hit on by pulse-challenged lovers looking to score by using advice such as:
  • Writing a poem for your new date may seem romantic until you rhyme trains with braaaainz. Just sends the wrong message.
  • It's giving the little things that add up to romance. Like your gall bladder. Save that for an extra special occasion.
  • While ear nibbling may be romantic, a detached lobe can be disconcerting. Spackle first. #goforthetoes
  • Nothing says romance like a night full of delicious goo-filled treats. Stock up on eyeballs before your date comes over.
  • Playing "Pull my finger" is a great way for the Undead to pop the question. Of course, she gets to keep the finger.
  • Blind dates don't always start out that way. #eyeballsmaketastyappetizers
Yeah, I know. Genius. It's a shock I'm still married.

The book didn't sell but its website and facebook page live on, it's the idea that just.won't.die. Pop over and grab a valentine for your sweetie. Nothin' says lovin' like eyeball goo.

1 comment:

  1. And the romance comes to an end when zombie suitor sees a rocket scientist pass by?