Open letter to future besties based on Facebook sidebar recommendations

Hello, random people on my sidebar! Facebook is positive we'll be besties in no time so there are a few things I should tell you before I hit the "friend me" button:

 - I hate being tickled. I will throw up on you, and then possibly junkpunch you for being a jerk

 - I like to eat weird food, so if you have a hankering for haggis, I'm your girl.

 - I had no nickname growing up. I am cool with that, so don't try to call me the Staceter or Stace-a-rooni or Spacey. Refer to highlight #1, with less vomit.

 - I love my readers and live for the day that I see one of the tarot cards as a festive tattoo. Just not on the face since your job prospects may go down and I'll feel semi-responsible for feeding you.

 It's go-time, new friends! Except the guy without a shirt on. You'll have to wait. 

3 comments:

  1. William KendallJanuary 1, 2014 at 3:51 PM

    Haggis?

    Haggis???

    To quote King Arthur: "Run away! Run away!"

    ReplyDelete
  2. TherealvdJanuary 1, 2014 at 8:41 PM

    I agree with the tickling, I also hate having my face touched. I could hobble someone for that.

    ReplyDelete
  3. weeghostiesJanuary 2, 2014 at 4:51 PM

    I nearly decapitated my ophthalmologist today for poking me in the eyeball. Give a girl a warning, eh?

    ReplyDelete

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