What's taboo for you?
As I've mentioned before, writers are a *special* breed -- as in "isn't she spechul, she just loves playing the nose whistle. Yes, she's self-taught." But I believe part of it is a primal urge to not screw up whatever mojo we've got going for us. Superstition can be useful - don't lick an electric razor on the same side twice - or used as a cautionary tale - ".. and that's why cats don't have thumbs."
I find that the more luck I have in submitting my goofy bits of high literature - stop looking at me like that - to the public, the more I want to repeat that success by repeating the process in all of its OCD glory. I neeeeed a clean desk, tea and dead silence. I mean it. Don't breathe. This, of course, is nearly impossible with five children under the age of 16 so I tend to work a lot during afternoon naps or when it's the middle of the night and I can drool on my keyboard without anyone poking me and asking a sister if it's okay to bury me outside.
In a highly scientific survey of writers on facebook, I found that some of the most outwardly sane writers have a few kinks in their repertoire:
- Beth enjoys mumbling, sideways glances and a twitch while writing fiction. Okay, everyday life. Whatever.
- Wendy writes while (wait, what's another "w" word) sipping green tea with her feet up. When stuck in a plot hole, she climbs out while pacing. That's got to be fun for the neighbors to watch.
- Tracy taps a Thesaurus for luck before writing. Then she IMs me when she gets stuck. WTH?
- Amy lays claim to the computer by surrounding it with Magic Tiara life force. *backs away slowly* I'm not even touching that one.
Fess up, what do you do to get in the groove? Barry White? Running in small circles?
Photo: Courtesy of flickr.com
How not to be the spoonrest - Book proposals
One of my co-agent buddies, YA novelist Megan Curd, asked me what goes into a proposal as she's used to a synopsis so I thought I'd elucidate in case anyone else was curious. I am by no means an expert on proposals so I'm dragging y'all along on this as my learning curve morphs into a workable proposal. Each agent has her preference as to how they are formatted but it's good to have the basics down before diving into the query process unprepared to send a proposal after they respond with a request.
Think of the proposal as a business plan. It consists of manageable chunks of information that break down for the agent and the future editor what the book is about and how you as the author plan to help with marketing and promotion.
- Introduction - where you present the premise of the book and how it will better the lives of millllllions.
- Author Bio - by far the worst part of writing this thing. The thesaurus ran out of words for "awesome."
- Marketing - Who are these fabulous people that will buy your book? What market are you targeting so they get a glimmer that you're out there rubbing elbows with the big boys? Don't forget your tiny markets, in my case, zombie enthusiasts are a prime target for the book but so are humor/dating/college-age/alternative markets. It also makes a dandy anti-Valentine gift for the person who has just given up on finding a mate with a pulse.
- Completion date/estimated word count - What reasonable amount of time you expect the book to be finished after signing the book contract. Don't go crazy and say two or more years. You'll get the eye-roll and they'll go back to digging out the grounds floating on top of their coffee with their spoon. Guess whose project gets to be the spoonrest?
- Competitive titles - Similar titles and themes (zombies) so editors know if your subject has legs. If you find no one has been published on your subject, is it viable for editors to take a chance on? Okay, granted horny zombies aren't thick on the ground (thank god) but the wealth of zombie titles out there give this little pop culture goodie a chance.
- Promotion - Often a scary word to writers because who wants to leave the comfort of their pajamas to sit at a table and smile for hours. Okay, I have no problem with that but I suspect others may -- and I'll be too hopped up on sugar and gin to care. How else can you promote the book? Lectures, Skype interviews for book clubs, in my case - zombie walks and wars, conferences for your target audience, tv/radio/podcast interviews, book trailers, blog tours. Get creative and zombies will beat a path to your door. Wait. Scratch that.
- Chapter summaries/table of contents - Now to the guts of the project. Nonfiction writers spell out how the book will be broken down for the reader. I chose to write mine in voice of THE ZOMBIE DATING GUIDE'S host, Undead Fred, since it's a humor book and it presents the kind of feel I am going for. Don't try this at home if you're writing a book on infectious diseases. Nothing but the Clap is regarded as funny in that realm.
- Sample chapters - Most books recommend to send two. I'm sending five. Wha? I'm a prolific little bugger.
Do your homework, research your prospective agents for their preferences and don't be afraid of making a few mistakes. It happens, they understand and only giggle a little.
Books to check out that I found helpful:
Have any tips you'd like to pass along?
One from my agent, Dawn Frederick: Always double-space and paginate your proposals. She says, "Trust me, many folks forget those 2 minor details. But if the idea is good, any agent knows it can be fixed later :)"
Think of the proposal as a business plan. It consists of manageable chunks of information that break down for the agent and the future editor what the book is about and how you as the author plan to help with marketing and promotion.
- Introduction - where you present the premise of the book and how it will better the lives of millllllions.
- Author Bio - by far the worst part of writing this thing. The thesaurus ran out of words for "awesome."
- Marketing - Who are these fabulous people that will buy your book? What market are you targeting so they get a glimmer that you're out there rubbing elbows with the big boys? Don't forget your tiny markets, in my case, zombie enthusiasts are a prime target for the book but so are humor/dating/college-age/alternative markets. It also makes a dandy anti-Valentine gift for the person who has just given up on finding a mate with a pulse.
- Completion date/estimated word count - What reasonable amount of time you expect the book to be finished after signing the book contract. Don't go crazy and say two or more years. You'll get the eye-roll and they'll go back to digging out the grounds floating on top of their coffee with their spoon. Guess whose project gets to be the spoonrest?
- Competitive titles - Similar titles and themes (zombies) so editors know if your subject has legs. If you find no one has been published on your subject, is it viable for editors to take a chance on? Okay, granted horny zombies aren't thick on the ground (thank god) but the wealth of zombie titles out there give this little pop culture goodie a chance.
- Promotion - Often a scary word to writers because who wants to leave the comfort of their pajamas to sit at a table and smile for hours. Okay, I have no problem with that but I suspect others may -- and I'll be too hopped up on sugar and gin to care. How else can you promote the book? Lectures, Skype interviews for book clubs, in my case - zombie walks and wars, conferences for your target audience, tv/radio/podcast interviews, book trailers, blog tours. Get creative and zombies will beat a path to your door. Wait. Scratch that.
- Chapter summaries/table of contents - Now to the guts of the project. Nonfiction writers spell out how the book will be broken down for the reader. I chose to write mine in voice of THE ZOMBIE DATING GUIDE'S host, Undead Fred, since it's a humor book and it presents the kind of feel I am going for. Don't try this at home if you're writing a book on infectious diseases. Nothing but the Clap is regarded as funny in that realm.
- Sample chapters - Most books recommend to send two. I'm sending five. Wha? I'm a prolific little bugger.
Do your homework, research your prospective agents for their preferences and don't be afraid of making a few mistakes. It happens, they understand and only giggle a little.
Books to check out that I found helpful:
- How to write a book proposal by Michael Larson
- Get known before the book deal by Christina Katz
- How to sell, then write your nonfiction book by Blythe Camenson
- Rants & Ramblings by literary agent, Rachel Gardner
- Nathan Bransford's take on how to format a proposal
Have any tips you'd like to pass along?
One from my agent, Dawn Frederick: Always double-space and paginate your proposals. She says, "Trust me, many folks forget those 2 minor details. But if the idea is good, any agent knows it can be fixed later :)"
What's a grill to do?
Who says writers are a solitary bunch of miscreants? Okay, we're pretty much agreed there BUT when I put out the call for a super secret zombie mission, Melanie Avila stepped up with no hesitation to model for THE ZOMBIE DATING GUIDE'S proposal photo shoot. I won't spill the beans on what she's doing in the other photos but let's just say she's limber... very limber.
Thanks Hoo!!!
Who's the clown in your family?
I returned from a week in Oregon where I met with my family to help my mother pack up her house of thirty years. Aside from hard work, questionable photos of me during my teenage years and toooooooons of potato salad (which I am still trying to work off with belly dancing), I realized one very important thing.I am the least funny person in my family.
As a humor writer, I've grown used to a chuckle or two while in polite society and though I have yet to make my husband laugh - he will be mine, oh yes, all mine - I usually get some pretty positive feedback to what I've written. Girl, I have nothing on these people. My sisters married clever men, my brothers still have the ability to make me snort milk from my nose (okay, we've upgraded to wine) (ow), and I'm left giggling under the dining room table with my niece because I'm not quick enough with a comeback that would even stand a chance. I remember sitting around that same table as a young teenager and wishing I was funny enough to compete with their wit.
I'm still not there. But I'm gaining on them. ;)
Is there someone in your family that makes you want to try a little bit harder to sit at the grown-ups table?
Photo: My family clown, Vyolette, and her boyfriend, Vader.
Baaaa. Whom do you follow (blog-wise, stalking offline doesn't count)?
I am an intermittent reader of blogs. I love them, collect them, share them with my friends then invariably wander off because I have the attention span of carpet fluff. However, I do get reigned back in about every two weeks and settle down with a pot of coffee to go through my favorites via Google Reader. I have currently 42. I need more coffee.
I'm curious to see what are some of your favorite blogs? Are they about writing? Life? Writing about life? Do you prefer photos of happy smiling children or straight talk aout business? I love funny blogs, publishing blogs and small business blogs because I still have that granola empire floating around in the back of my mind. Hmmmm, hey Dawn, how about a granola cookbook after the zombies? ;)
Here are just a few of my favorites, please check my link list for more-
Humor blogs:
- An Army of Ermas: I admit, I'm biased on this one since I own it BUT these folks are seriously funny.
- Mind over Mullis: Fellow Erma and one of the funniest women I know, I'm waiting for her reality show debut featuring giraffes in stretchy pants.
- Dooce: Trust me.
- Harley May: Another Erma and going places fasssssssst. And she says I'm pretty. She obviously has excellent taste in writers.
- Wisecrack Zodiac: I told you I like my Ermas. Beth Bartlett's great horoscope blog is looking for an agent, I can't recommend her enough! The writing is sharp, witty and makes that full moon staring you in the face when you turn around in the mirror seem less of a cosmic joke and more of a sign from the universe telling you to lay off the ding-dongs.
- The Zebra Rag: Yep, another Erma. Angie Mansfield's take on "All the news that's unfit to print." The girl has a serious zombie complex - isn't she fabulous?
Publishing blogs:
- Red Sofa Literary : My agent, Dawn Frederick, and my partner in this crazy business. Her blog was a great help in determining if we'd be a good fit before I queried. I knew when I sent off the initial email with a big smile on my face that good things would come!
- The Swivet: Colleen Lindsay from FinePrint Literary Management. Love her and love her (sometimes) orange hair.
- Agent in the Middle: My editor for HUNGRY FOR YOUR LOVE, Lori Perkin's blog. :)
- Nathan Bransford: Agent for Curtis Brown and all around good friend to writers. Excellent advice.
- Query Shark
- WOW! Women on Writing: Love these writers, great tips!
I love my author blogs, yes, yes I do:
- Jason Tudor: Brilliant, funny and yes, he did pay me to say that.
- Hoosblog: Melanie Avila, pre-published and rockin' the red velour track suit.
- Editing Hat: Adam Slade's great blog on his road to publication. Look for A Reaper's Tale: The Undecided from Lyrical Press on May 17th! Yes, money exchanged hands for this promo too. Darn these FCC regulations. ;)
- Something She Wrote: Janna Qualman's blog that is building quite a community!
- Sharyn McCrumb: Simply my favorite author in the whole wide world. :) (She didn't pay me to say this, I've just been a huge fan for fifteen years)
- JuneBug Kramin: I'm still trying to pronounce the name of that fish that Jennifer Caddell at Writing Builds Characters was having trouble with in Hawaii. Luckily, Bug can say it with her eyes closed. She assured me that was a talent... somewhere.
There are many many more in the links but Barbie Pegasus (and the zombies) are calling and I need to refresh my coffeepot else my blood runs dry.
I'd love to add your favorite blogs to my link list, whatcha got?
photo credit: http://clker.com
What a long, strange trip it's been. Agents and agony.
Okay, not so much agony but it looks freakin' awesome in the title.
After a weird week of two rejections days within each other and still waiting for my full to come full circle with another agent, I sent out the zombies one more time into the unknown to search for a great agent. They came back with a doozy. Less than an hour after I sent my query, she wrote back asking for the proposal -- then not long after that was sent (ALWAYS have your synopsis or proposal prepared before you query), she asked if we could chat the next day. I could tell from her email that she was excited about the project and that made me squee just a little bit more. Maybe I wasn't left to humming show tunes quietly to myself in a corner while I wrote about the Undead. Maybe, someone "got it."
Oh, she got it alright.
Within minutes of being on the phone, we were talking about Zombie Wars and children. Wha? Think they're mutually exclusive? Wait till you have five, my friend. I was very happy to accept her offer of representation later that afternoon.
A few things I picked up along the way to agenthood:
After a weird week of two rejections days within each other and still waiting for my full to come full circle with another agent, I sent out the zombies one more time into the unknown to search for a great agent. They came back with a doozy. Less than an hour after I sent my query, she wrote back asking for the proposal -- then not long after that was sent (ALWAYS have your synopsis or proposal prepared before you query), she asked if we could chat the next day. I could tell from her email that she was excited about the project and that made me squee just a little bit more. Maybe I wasn't left to humming show tunes quietly to myself in a corner while I wrote about the Undead. Maybe, someone "got it."
Oh, she got it alright.
Within minutes of being on the phone, we were talking about Zombie Wars and children. Wha? Think they're mutually exclusive? Wait till you have five, my friend. I was very happy to accept her offer of representation later that afternoon.
A few things I picked up along the way to agenthood:
- For the love of god, read their website and what they represent. Save yourself a lot of time and energy by taking a minute to visit their site, agentquery.com and querytracker.com to see if you're even in the ballpark. Mistakes happen, the lure of a fantastic agent has led many a writer to fire off a query to an agent that wouldn't be the right fit. Spend that energy toward doing more research: twitter, blogs, google her and see if her style matches your own.
- Be prepared to MOVE when they ask to see something. Don't fiddlefart around, this isn't the time to do last-minute edits or stick in an extra scene. It's Business Time, baby. ;)
- Follow your instincts. I knew within minutes of talking to my agent (HAHAHAHA, sorry, it's still a little fresh) that we'd be a good match. If you're getting anything that says this:
It's the universe's little way of telling you to keep looking.
- Never give up, never give in. They'll eventually cave. They all do. Oops, that's from the book -- nevermind.
What Would Jane Austen Do?
I am an unabashed Janeite.
My husband and I have long Austen weekends where we discuss her work and nitpick the heck out of Mary Bennet. I named the heroine of my romantic suspense WIP, Pocket Full of Posies, Bennet. I am currently embroiled in the Jane Austen March Madness though my boy, Wentworth, fell to that cad, Darcy in the second round. I often ask myself What Would Jane Do when faced with a conundrum. I've even flirted with the thought of writing a little Regency romance but then I'd have to stick in a zombie or other unmentionable and it's been done. ;)
I have a set of Pride and Prejudice paper dolls.
So when I saw the Jane Austen Challenge on The Life and Lies of an Inanimate Object, to read as many Austen and Austen-esque novels I had to rethink -- just how many have I read again? The challenge is to be complete by the end of 2010 with levels of finishing the works.
I'm going for Level 3: 6 Austen novels and five re-writes, sequels, prequels or spoofs.
Pride and PrejudiceSense and SensibilityPersuasion- Northhanger Abbey
- Emma
- Mansfield Park
Jane Bites BackPride and Prejudice and Zombies- Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters
- Murder at Mansfield Park
- Confessions of a Jane Austen Addict
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